...........PLUS.......EVERY important and caring relationship I have ever had has ended in pain........and this was, up until 72 hours ago....a consistently caring and soothing relationship. my T did a 180 degree turn with the way she ended things.

........i don't want another relationship to end in pain......

the relationship i had with my therapist up until 72 hours ago was one that had revived my capacity to think relationships could be good and could last and that someone could still care about me and not turn me away....during the ups and the down.

i have no relationships for the very reason that i have never had anyone accept me as me and stay around...every relationship with meaning has ended in pain.

.......i don't want to give up on this one yet.......wishing it could end more soothing....