I have met sons who have lost their mother to suicide. It is a hole thhy can never fill
A mother is the most specisl thing in life for a son
He needs you. He loves you. He will NEVER get over it
Ignore these intrusivd thoughts like hooligan said
Thy are lying to you
Besides that...find love for yourself. You are worth a good life. You deserve to prosper
It is your birthright to live and learn and find joy
You ARE plenty just as u are
Never forget it