Hello magic4545, welcome to Psych Central.
We can't diagnose here but it does sound like you have some mental health issues. Taking alcohol and/or drugs are going to make the issues worse. You might like to take some online tests to get more of a picture of what is going on for you.
The Sanity Score - Test Your Mental Wellness and
Psychological Tests and Quizzes You can print out the results and show them to your doctor.
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Pegasus
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