Welcome to Psych Central Brittany. Sorry to hear you have suffered abuse for so long. No one should have to go through that. You have said a wise thing about not touching him or pushing him. Those might be interpreted by him as threats. Stick to your strategy to protect yourself.

Even if you want to stay together and make the relationship work, having an abuse safety plan is strongly advised when you have experienced abuse in the past. Here are articles that may be helpful.
Psych Central - Search results for An abuse safety plan

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I try to get exercise - I also do yoga and other gentle stretching exercises and meditation to help me get started.