Yes, so well said! I think you summed up my feelings exactly at the time: "I have no right to live and be a burden on anyone else." Everywhere I went, I felt like I was encroaching, burdening people, treading on toes, making a nuisance of myself. I truly believed that if I were dead, these people would all be relieved.

For a long time I regretted my own birth, because I believed I was forcing my unhappily married parents to stay together, I felt guilty when asking people for things in general, even when it was their job to provide a certain service, I even felt guilty walking over the road at one of those pedestrian-crossings where the cars have to wait for you to walk over, because I believed I was holding the driver up. At my university, I truly believed I didn't deserve to be there because it always seemed like other people loved their work and were so enthusiastic, and here I was dreading it daily. This feeds an unending cycle of deepening guilt and I believe it's what drives a person far enough so that one day he/she really believes their death is the solution or the answer to all the issues.