Hi Illegal, I'm really sorry you're finding things so hard right now
And going with "Nobody can help . . . trust me I know".............there can be times when no-one or nothing can help in the sense of "making it go away" but that doesn't need to mean that no-one can help make it just a little/even the tiniest bit easier for you until......just that bit to help you know you're not on your own, others understand, that you're heard, that what you're feeling matters...........and that bit can sometimes add up and add up to give you the strength you need to hang on in there, to find/try different ways to make it through, to slowly move past the way you're feeling in time..............
And this you probably know..........but I've got to say it anyway..........but depression can completely blind you to the options out there, the possibilities.........doesn't mean they're not there though.........and with help with the depression............
And the "loser" bit.........well the depression talking there?? Because you're not a loser, believe I've said that "once or twice" before, right?? And you're still NOT convincing me!!!
So keep on talking to us, hey?? We're here for you!!!

Alison