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pinksoil said:
After the group was over, the therapist that I work with on Wednesdays told me that I have a natural ability to draw the honesty and authenticity out of people. A natural ability. WHOOHOOOO. Haha... BUT I LOVE WHAT I AM DOING.
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Pink that is great news! I'm not surprised though, you do have the draw out ability. You've done it on here at PC...
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pinksoil said:
Today, T said that I have found a connection to something. He seems really happy about that. He looks so happy when I describe it. I think it is because he can see how happy I am when I talk about it. He encourages me to talk about it a lot.
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I agree! I can feel the happiness from you.
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pinksoil said:
It was strange having therapy on a Saturday. At 3:30. You know what's even stranger? Next week it's going to be on Saturday at 7 PM. He has another conference on Friday.
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I would be like 'and I'll bring the martinis'...That is what 7pm says to me but that is just my hysterical side coming out.
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pinksoil said:
I told him about a dream I had. In the dream, he wasn't wearing his wedding ring. He was explaining to me why he wasn't wearing it, but I couldn't hear anything he said. No sound was coming out of his mouth.
I told him how difficult it is for me to talk about that. Because it involves "the A-word," as he named it. (He knows I have trouble with the word attachment at this point, so doesn't force it on me, lol).
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Very good and very assertive. You sound like me when I tell T the same about the word transference. One time he said, 'I know, if I say that word you're going to hit me'...and we both laughed. I love his sense of humor.
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pinksoil said:
Then I told him how easy it has become for me to get angry at him, rather than having to face the "other emotions" of transference. He was like, "Ohhhh, other emotions? And which emotions are these?" There was no way I was ready to talk about them. I had acknowledged that they exists, and that was enough for me today. We talked about why it is so hard for me to talk about those emotions with him. But I wasn't ready to actually explore them yet. I told him that I'm sure it wasn't a suprise for him to learn that there are a mess of intense emotions within my transference for him-- that he has to be aware of this. He agreed.
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I hate to be the one to say this but I think he probably already know Pink. I like to think that when I dance around topics with my T that he has no clue what I'm talking about. They get the clues in what we say but my T and your T handle the responses differently. Yours waits for you to go there and makes you feel okay along the way. Mine would never ask me what emotions I have about him. I just know he wouldn't...
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pinksoil said:
Therapy is hard. And he looked really good today. %#@&#! wedding ring. %#@&#! transference. lol...
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Therapy is so hard but thanks to you advising me to read McWilliams, it is becoming so much more clear. I'm wondering if I should share what I'm learning from her with my T? I wonder it'll make him feel bad...who knows.