I can relate to your plight, I'm sorry for what you're both going through. I think its looking like she's wanting you to decide between her and everything else. Counseling or her, walking away or her, etc. Been there where I had to choose having friends or at least acquaintances or him. If she's not ok with your counseling together or separately, do you feel its a healthy relationship? Are you prepared to stay or walk away? Many hugs and positive vibes your way