This has been going on for 6 years, with me and a certain man I love, I struggle to remember even the simplest of things, example, yesterday I couldnt even do the laundry right, made him so mad, he taught me three times in a row, and yet I couldnt remember how to do it, whats wrong with me? I always forget how to do somethings, if I was trying hard enough or put in more effort, they would say, then I wouldnt make so many mistakes. I black out while standing, but to others it looks like im spacing out, and I guess I am. I'm pretty easily distracted, making everyone upset around me. I trip on things even when theres nothing to trip on. I'm so clumsy. I feel so stupid, sometimes I think maybe everyone's lives be better if I was there, I cry so much, instead of doing something about it. I dont have high confidence in myself, even though he tells me im beautiful, I didnt believe him, I know I should but I dont see myself as anything. Sometimes my mind wanders to thinking what is my purpose in life. I'm anti social, my parents hardly let me go out much when i was younger. I'm negative against myself. My lover gave up on me and our relationship because I cried so much. I didnt defend him against my family, he felt alone, I wasnt there, now im just depressed, I dont know what I should do with myself, Just I feel so stupid, and dumb. sorry for the long paragraph.