You cannot grab onto anything in life, it's impossible, everything comes and goes. Everything. There is nothing to hold onto. There is actually a sense of peace in this. You would benefit greatly from meditation techniques and even Buddhist teachings if you're open to such concepts.

Satsang videos on youtube...people to listen to about this type of thing are - Moojiji, Gangaji, Byron Katie, Adyashanti, Ram Dass, Terence Mckenna, Benjamin Smythe, Darryl Anka, Ralph Smart, and Pema Chodron.

Life is a wave, we can surf it but we can't hold on. The art of letting go. Material fades away but consciousness remains.