lunatic soul, I deal with PTSD, and therapy has helped (far from perfect). But in order for it to help any significant way, you need to open up more. I don't mean at this instant, but eventually.

Traumatic memories create a bad situation because the actual trauma is scary and then even thinking about them or talking about them is scary and triggers the person, so you keep the awful things that were damaging far away from consciousness. Naturally you would not want the therapist to bring them out. You've spent a lot of time trying to keep them away, feels counterintuitive.

But the very fact that you keep them away actually strengthens the fear you feel about them. And they gain power over you. Once you can talk about them and let the emotions express themselves, you can be free of them or at least reduce their power significantly. This is hard obviously but doable, and there are many PTSD patients who have gone through this.

However, in order for you to be able to do this, is that you need to be in control. You need to feel safe. You need to feel that you're sharing only how much you want, that you have a supportive therapist, and also maybe even some sort of support when you're not seeing therapist (because memories are related and sometimes one memory brings up another, so it's good to have someone to share this with or if you feel sad or anxious).

Soon you will start to see the positive effect of this, as the trauma starts to lose its power over you once exposed to light of day and seen for what it is, memory of things past.