Thanks for responding. That's...hard to hear but probably something I need to hear. I too have spent many, many nights in the hospital b/c of potassium or other electrolyte abnormalities (I just got released today actually) or cardiac issues or fainting episodes. And none of it seems to really scare me. Not as much as it should. I've lost several friends to various complications from their EDs, but I don't really think I have a rock bottom, I think my rock bottom is death. And that's scary. Really scary. I don't want to die. I just don't know if I can stop. Thanks for sharing your story. I'm sorry about your sister.