I think it was appropriate to initiate with the coach, but agree that face to face would have probably been the best way to go and gotten you better results. I would have left out the part about the coach's son since the whole point of contacting him was to discuss *your* boy. I think emailing him back about your being hurt was not a good move. But, what's done is done. If you had confronted him in person about his email, maybe it would have been a better interaction. I agree with everyone else about choosing a different coach if you can. I hope things get better, kids should be able to have fun doing what they love without being balked at.