Brown Owl, I can relate to what you say here. My previous therapist did not understand me, and she kept rephrasing and retelling what I said in ways that had nothing to do with what I meant or thought or felt. She was a very competent therapist - I have seen very positive testimonies from her other clients - but she just didn't get where I was coming from, and I never got the impression that she was trying to understand. To me it felt as if she was trying to get me to fit into her view of what people are like. Eventually I left her, and started therapy with my current T. And he does try to understand, and very often he succeeds. Not always, and there are other things about him that are not perfect, but for me it was a huge improvement to get a T who actually tries to see the world as I see it, instead of just trying to convince me that I'm not seeing it that way.

I don't know whether changing Ts would be the best thing to do for you, but I know that for me, it changed things and made them so much easier when I got a more understanding T.