(((ohwellthen)))

This is not a nice situation to be in at all and I am so sorry to hear what you have been through.

Your hopes, your dreams, the life you had imagined, the kids you thought you would have, the person who you thought was your eternal person for life ..... shattered ..... the day you found out that he had fallen for someone else.

The further challenge is that you have to face him and his new girlfriend every day. This must be incredibly painful. "You thought you'd be able to handle it". Personally, if it were me, no, I do not think I would handle this on my own [possibly with a lot of intense professional support in real life but certainly not on my own no]. And the fact that you're constantly aware at work that he has eyes for her? Awful! He has no right what so ever to be giving you "signals" ..... this is misleading. Perhaps he does this out of guilt as he woud be well aware of how much he has hurt you and wants to make you feel a bit "better" I guess rather that than being nasty to you? Well sorry, that just doesn't cut it and nor does it make what he's done right.

Oh well that is quite easy for people on the side line to say "forget him". How? You were supposed to share the rest of your life with him weren't you and now he's in your face every day with the girl that was meant to be you.

You still have feelings of care for him and have described this as "loving".

"ACTING" like we'll work this out - well this has me very confused and I think it stems from how he keeps giving you these mixed signals. He's ACTING. It's a bluff. You are HOPING. Of course you are hoping! This was your future right? Who wants to give up on that? Nobody. You "love" him. Sure. You still love him. You loved him for a long time. You loved him then. You love him now. And boy does he know this and he will continue to play on this. It must feel really good for him, wow, he's got a new girl that he's fallen in love with and bonus his ex still loves him too. This must be quite gratifying for him. You hope "we'll fix this" and you still dream of being married to him.

This is a vicious cycle.

You still love him. He acts like he really cares. He sends you mixed signals. You are constantly reminded on a daily basis of the life you were meant to lead. You still want this life. You still love him.

"WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?"

Oh I don't really know the right answer to this really to be honest.

Everything written above is based on my personal stance of events.

I am sure that they may certainly be parts I have typed that you may completely disagree with. It's merely my peronal take.

If it were me I would be doing some serious thinking here.

And working out the positives and negatives of each choice you have.

Yes, you have a choice. Each one needs a cost benefit analysis. Only you can truthfully do this.

1. You continue to work at your job. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

2. You seek an alternative job. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

3. You continue to hope and dream knowing that he is merely giving you mixed signals? What are the advantages and disadvantages?

4. You possibly even outright tell him you still love him and want a future with him. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

5. You seek professional therapy to help you process the magnitude of what has happened. What are the advantages and disadvantages?

I could give you quite a few different examples of options you may have.

And I am sure that you can think of some extra ones yourself too.

But I guess in response to the question what are you supposed to do?

Plot out each and every possible scenario.

Weigh up the advantages and disadvantages of each.

And then YOU choose which option is best for you.

And stick to your decision.

Best wishes moving forward.