This is a tough one. As a parent myself, I'd be very upset. It is such a fine line because lets say you and your husband both start calling the therapist with stuff for her to watch out for.

That might impede her ability to help your daughter in her therapy. I don't really like the confidentiality thing when we are talking about a minor though but I understand the point as your therapist sees it.

Under what circumstances is her therapist obligated to tell you anything about your daughter's sessions?? she is 13...

I can feel the love you have for your daughter. I feel the exact same way about my son.