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sunrise said:
But meanwhile, my husband is bugging me and says his lawyer says I need to contact the T and say X. And I don't want to. I want to say Y, which is important to say and that the T told me, at the outset of therapy, to tell her about. AAAACKKK! I am a communications disaster, as you can tell. Should I just tell my husband "you call the T if you want to say X"? Or should I say "it's inappropriate to say X to the T, as you and your lawyer want, but if possible, I will try to communicate Y to her?" Sometimes I just feel so messed up. I really am trying to do the right thing.

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I would be severely ticked with my husband and his lawyer, frankly. Is there any reason you have to answer to your husband or do what he prefers? If your instincts as a mother tell you to do or say "Y," imo, your best bet is to go with that. No apologies, no explanations. It's your choice, and he can do his own dirty work.

Sorry if that sounds harsh and if I'm butting in where I don't belong, but my husband used to try to dictate to me, too, and it's a real hot button.