Thanks for this thread.

I hope you're able to pass your class despite your current thought pattern.

I am going through something similar to you in that I am in love with or infatuated with someone other than my wonderful and supporting fiance. Currently and for the past few years my intrusive thoughts have been centered around this other guy and I've been highly compelled to see him or contact him. We already have quite a history and I've made some really stupid decisions fueled by the desire to be with him. I've been honest with my fiance about it and he is really understanding. He knows that I recognize this as part of my illness. It concerns me that these thoughts will cause me to do more things to damage my relationship, and battling against them every day is so painful.

It is so troubling to me that because I'm bipolar, I develop intense feelings for people that end up being really problematic.

Also lately I have been having thoughts like "what is the point of living anyway?" and that my reputation is tainted and I'm a worthless human being. I also am constantly wondering if people can tell there's something wrong with me.