Hello & Welcome, John615.
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Originally Posted by John615
Basically I just want to ... feel!
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We are not medical professionals here and cannot diagnose. Nevertheless, that statement and many others in your post tend to support your own suspicions:
Quote:
Originally Posted by John615
I often feel sad, to the edge that I think this is plain depression, not sadness.
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Does your situation permit you to speak with a doctor about how you have been feeling?
Please make yourself at home here.
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My dog

mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.