bear, i know exactly how you are feeling and it can become extremely frustrating, but tomorrow is always a brighter day!!!!! you can find something that will make you smile. people will always fail you and never live up to your expectations. i love you man, you can't give up because giving up is way too easy. struggling sucks ***, but it's better than not living. things will work out in your favor soon enough. take care of yourself, because only you can.
personally, for me, when i quit the meds and the therapy (not suggesting this, just sharing) that is when life became more clear and seemed to be more positive for me. sure the world is effed up, but you will run into some pretty amazing people that make life worth living, even if they're just your friends.