I feel that way a lot. But in my case I was Dx years ago with both PTSD And at first MDD then BP but I refused to believe in the BP. I felt PSTD was acceptable because the CSA was there but the BP no. I spent years fighting meds and sometimes being over medicated but I really made things things worse by attributing everything to the PTSD and fighting meds. I spend too much time I what maybe coulda been if I had just accepted things much sooner. Finishing school, having steady employment, way less hospitizations.