Your original post pretty much sums up my thoughts exactly. Im fortunate that, albeit this recent depression, I don't normally go too low...I'm still able to function quite well. My only regrets while manic have been the sexual indiscretions. Gulp, I can't stand when my head wants to think about those idiots, and the biggest idiot...me. I Mostly hate the fact that I will never get those primative years back with my kids. I was such a mess with the challenges of raising kids both in diapers that I went into survival mode vs soaking up all that goodness. C'est la vi