Lately things in therapy have been difficult.

My therapist has been asking me questions and talking to me, instead of answering and being ok I find myself shrugging, giving half answers and not really engaging. It's so frustrating as in my head I know what I want to say and out loud I can't seem to.

I feel a real disconnect with T. On one hand I had a huge breakthrough in that I feel very secure that T would be there for me and very happy that I could choose not to need her or email her. I have felt very in control. Then my sstupid anxious brain took over and said I would not contact her even if I wanted to, my anxiety would not allow that comfort. It's so frustrating. I just want to be able to enjoy the security without anxiety seeing another chance at control and I want to be able to express my feelings without just muttering like a sullen teenager.