I feel conflicted about my current T. I know I should talk to her about all this, but I feel the need to organize my thoughts first--and I think I need help with that. I know that no one can really know exactly what the situation is and that my explanation is obviously only from my interpretation of interactions, but I appreciate any thoughts anyone can share. (Sorry, I just realized how long this is, so thanks in advance to anyone who takes the time to read all the way through.)

My T sometimes seemed to be very empathetic and interested in helping but sometimes now seems apathetic or irritated by me. I've been seeing her about every 2 weeks for a little under a year, with about 2 months off over the holidays. I mostly see her for ADD, ED, and anxiety, and she is a CBT therapist. At first I thought focusing on the here and now would be good, but this seems so impersonal and unconcerned with individual experiences. I'm not sure if my shy personality gives off a sense of indifference or aloofness and she is just reacting to that or if maybe the amount my insurance pays is too low and makes her feel like the time is not worth it or if I'm just not trying hard enough in her opinion. One time she did say that she had trouble knowing what I was thinking, and I meant to ask what she meant but I felt like the time passed for it. Maybe this makes her feel like I'm indifferent and not trying? Or maybe CBT just isn't right for me? Or maybe she has things going on outside work that are taking all her attention and focus? Or maybe I'm making a huge deal out of nothing and understanding all these interactions incorrectly?

Here are the things that cause me to feel like she isn't interested in working with me or is disinterested in general:
-She has cancelled appointments through her office and never acknowledged the last-minute nature of the cancellations and lack of ability to reschedule (even though she has a strict cancellation policy for patients, only allowing 3 ever with a high fee).
-She has cut appointments to 1/2 the normal time (because of personal engagements) with no notice until I've arrived and begun the appointment.
-She seems to repeat the same monologue about behaviors relating to my issues over and over again, with no progression of adjustments or changes (almost like it's the same appointment over and over again).
-She doesn't seem to remember specific things about me even though she seems to take lots of notes (things like my spirituality, concerns about taking medication, problems I indicated on intake paperwork, and tracking behaviors that I absolutely don't have problems with--like confusing me with someone else or looking for issues that just aren't there, I'm guessing).
-She asks for my input and opinion but then downplays my knowledge of my own experiences or doesn't address what I'm saying or concerned about (maybe I'm not communicating well?).

She has been warm and seemingly interested in my life and feelings and interests during some appointments, but lately she seems like she is just going through the motions and couldn't care less about me at all. The reason I feel so conflicted is that when I don't feel like I'm wasting her time, I do feel like our personalities are a good match. I have a really hard time syncing with Ts, and *sometimes* this relationship seems very well-matched--but those moments seem fewer and fewer. She does offer advice but in a way that is almost begrudgingly minimal. Now I mostly feel bad after appointments and get hung up on figuring out why I think they aren't going well. I'm also starting to doubt my own ability to interpret experiences and determine their significance, etc. I'm so obviously bothered by this therapeutic relationship now, but the thought of starting over *again* is too overwhelming for me to even think about.