I think you might be getting somewhere - like Somewhere. I remember going through something similar. It sucked big time, and I was very angry afterwards, but there was a lot of reenactment/re-experiencing there and ultimately a lot of growth. Hang in there IRL! 
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'...
At poor peace I sing
To you strangers (though song
Is a burning and crested act,
The fire of birds in
The world's turning wood,
For my sawn, splay sounds,)
...'
Dylan Thomas, Author's Prologue
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