Lex are you in therapy?

It took me along time to be able to have a comfortable relationship, where when I didn't want to do something I was not forced like in the past.

I was also in an abusive relationship.

Only do what you are comfortable doing, no one has a right to try and make you do something that you do not want to do. Can you explain to your bf abit about the ex so then maybe he'll get a better understanding to the why?

It takes while to be able to be confortable in a relationship after stuff like that. Take all the time you need, and let yourself heal. Even if you have to take a step back from the relationship to better yourself then do that.

I'm sorry you are hurting so much, I know exactly how you feel. It took me 8 years to really be in a relationship that wasn't scary ect. Now i've been in that relationship for over 3 yrs now and I'm not scared anymore. I can say what I want, do what I want without the worry of being hurt.

Do what is best for you right now.