I hate everything about it, even the name. All of everyone else's answers are spot on. And I hate when I'm asked when I go somewhere, am I not going to lose control? I tell them, it's not like I'm planning on losing control, it just happens.

However you want to look at it, bipolar sucks. It sucks having it and it sucks the life out of you. I told my therapist today that if I don't get it fully under control and remain that way, I will end up dead. Probably sooner than later if I am denied ssdi so I can afford to keep driving for treatment.