I hope I can post here.

So I do love my spouse but I am overwhelmed. I love who my spouse is. What I am overwhelmed by is what I feel is a blatant disregard for my feelings and my life.

I try to communicate as much as possible using "I statements" and non judemental language and being all "therapy" about it (i am in intensive therapy for ptsd and so my relationship comes up).

The point is this: I feel my spouse is really self abosrbed, we are on a limited budget and they are buying gold adidas sneakers, all sorts of new clothes and the cost of treatments and stuff is overwhelming, 1800 for beard removal while i fret over my med copays for epilpesy meds and sunglasses i need for migraines. if i try to talk about it, i get totally railroaded, accusations fly that i don't care and its a total nightmare.

I am on social security, i feel if my spouse wants gold adidas and electrolysis then they can get a higher paying job to afford it. am I out of line? I am getting yelled at by suggesting that. Spouse also makes comments about "going stealth" ie erasing past (me and the kids we have) and being new gendered life

im really at a loss.