(((valexand)))

I'm in a similar predicament as the person I feel I am in love with can no longer have a relationship with me due to his feelings for someone who rejected him in the past. Messy stuff.

Everyone tells me to get over it, or that it'll take time and from personal experience I know that is stupid advice. The best I can tell you is that, for me, writing my thoughts in a journal helps as well as letting the emotions out by crying, punching a pillow (or something else that won't hurt anything to let out physical anger), screaming (if it won't disturb others), etc helps too.

Also, it does help to make yourself emotionally available for new relationships in the future. The fact that in my situation the man suddenly closed himself off to me because of his fears of rejection and loneliness makes me realize that you are only hurting others by trying to protect yourself, and in the end you're hurting yourself too because you will be alone. It's hard to think of moving on to a new person, but really once you're done with appropriate mourning, that's what you have to do ultimately. You will get over it and find mutual true love in a new relationship.

Sorry if it appears I am assuming things that I don't know. I don't know how long you've been dealing with this or what your relationship status is now, but I understand the pain, and that's just some advice of what you might do if it's appropriate.