Quote:
Originally Posted by MoxieDoxie
When I discussed my suicidal intents with T he would express how much I mean to him, how much it would effect his life, how much he felt I had to offer this world and that it is a fact that as a therapist they know that at some point in their career they will lose someone to suicide and he did not want that to be me. I felt really guilty and if guilt stopped me then so be it.
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My T told me this many time before. Suicidal behavior was one of the reasons why I started therapy.
my t knows that people can manipulate with suicide to get what they want and thats why he very rarely are kind to me when Im suicidal, he doesnt want me to think that only being suicidal is the way he would show me his love.
I dont know about others buy when I am suicidal I crave for love etc but its wrong way to get this love.
Im talking about me not you. If my T told me how much I mean to him only shen Im suicidal, I would be more suicidal to get more his love but its so wrong.
Weird but when he is mad because I want to die it helps me understand that being suicidal is not okay, not good and I cant get love from people that way. Its painful at the time but it changed me and I stopped to cut and overdose what I did for 3 years.
Its about me but we all are different of course.