I don't think he realizes that. he grew up in an environment where the worst problem he had was his dad got angry easily. Not abusive, just short tempered. He had everything he wanted, heck he had an expensive go-kart growing up, a loving and supportive family, friends. I couldn't eat sometimes. I didn't have a home sometimes.

Now he feels terribly insecure because he's in his mid 30's and life is not perfectly stable like it was when he was growing up. He's never had to face that before. He doesn't make a ton of money but he does make enough that we can pay our bills, buy our food, and still have some leftover for hobbies. He still gets to go racing. He has his family help him buy a house. He has a stable job. He gets to go to school almost free because of his G.I. bill. He honestly does not understand when I tell him how good he has it. He doesn't know because he's never had negatives in his life in the way I have.

He thinks he's poor and worthless because he hasn't graduated from university yet by his mid 30's and he hasn't been able to save for retirement yet. But there are people out there who work 2 jobs and still can't save for retirement and who can't afford hobbies like we do. But it's hard for him to understand because he grow up where finances were never even moderately a concern. Where family was always loving and supportive. Where he had good friends. He got to go on trips every few years to Europe and had his parents buying race cars, regular cars, trailers, boats

I don't know how to explain. He makes nowhere near what his parents made and that's what he measure himself on so he feels like a failure. And he beats himself up that I'll have to get anxiety meds and start working a job (even though it gives me panic attacks) so that we can have better savings and support a child. He wishes he made enough that I could be a stay at home mom and because he can't he thinks he doesn't make enough money. It's hard for me to show him that he has it really good compared to a lot of people

EDIT: I'm sorry, English is not my first language so I am not sure how clearly I'm communicating. This is the low point in his life, basically. A nice 3 bed/2 bath home in a decent neighbourhood but not having money for trips to Europe or buying a 3rd and 4th and 5th car is the low point for him. It's the best I've ever had but it's different because of how he grew up