I'm aware of some of the physical differences between me and my T as well. I'm 30 and she's 46. I'm fit, but I have more of an hour glass "feminine" figure, whereas my T is extremely thin, no hips, no butt, etc. We're both athletic, but I'm more toned and she's more like "whoa, that is a muscular woman!" We also dress very differently; I'm very girly and she is not. About the only physical thing we have in common is that we have about the same chest size. I wouldn't have noticed that, though because she doesn't wear revealing clothes. I just happen to be talking about myself, and she was like "yeah, me too." I think the body differences are really interesting-- and, obviously, I am making comparisons here-- but it's not about competition. Nor is it about attraction. I'm not attracted to her. I prefer the way I look-- but I appreciate her for who she is. For me, it's really just about curiosity. It's interesting to simply observe the fact that we look SO different. We both eat healthy, we both work out, we're both white with blonde hair-- and yet we just look SO different. I'm also even a little bit amazed that her legs and waist and hips can be THAT small. She was wearing these pants yesterday that I commented on, and she was like "oh, they're a unique fabric. Feel it." So I felt the fabric (and it was unique) but what I noticed more than the material was just that her leg is so skinny. I'm fairly small myself (size 4 or 6 jeans) but her leg was like probably half the size of my leg! I'd be surprised if her jeans are bigger than a size 0.

Initially, I think I started noticing the differences in our bodies when I started getting more into fitness and my body started changing a bit. I wasn't really out of shape before-- I was just average. I was about 140, and I kicked up my running and weight lifting and went down to 128. I talked about it in therapy because I had never felt very comfortable with my body. My T said that my insecurities were coming from inside because, on the outside, she said I was beautiful. I told her I didn't necessarily feel that way, and she seemed genuinely surprised. I'm actually going on a vacation in a few days an it will be the first time I will ever wear a bikini on the beach-- and I'm nervous about it. So, last week, T actually had me bring in a picture of myself wearing it. She was extremely complimentary and worked to convince me that I looked great. But she also admitted that she doesn't wear a bikini and she feels self-conscious about her body as well. I can understand age-related insecurities because she's older than I am, but I can't understand how she could feel like she has "big" shoulders or that she "has a large frame." I told her that, in my view, she's tiny! She said she has never felt that way. It was actually really helpful for me to have this conversation with her, because it demonstrated how differently we can see ourselves compared to how other people see us. In her view, she said she thinks I'm small and pretty and she doesn't see why I have any insecurities. And, in my view, I can't understand how she doesn't think she's "tiny."