Believe me I feel for the pain and uncertainty in the therapist/client relationship. If it's any consolation, I was just reading in a book today that therapists who stop touching the patient are actually trying to strengthen the transference dependency. Touching keeps the relationship more realistic. The T wants the patient's transference fantasy to go deeper by leaving more to the imagination. I'm sure this doesn't help, tho, when what you need is a little caring recognition for your suffering.