I am really struggling with a huge sense of worry and am quite destabilised by not knowing exactly when my therapist will be leaving. I am struggling under the surface with huge anxiety about it and what the next steps may need to be......let alone grieving losing him.

And yet I feel so guilty about it. I didn't want to express the depth of how hard this is on me to him......and finally today it spilled out near the end of session. And he looked at me with a mix of deep compassion but also what looked like sorrow/guilt at causing this for me and apologised for the situation. I instantly felt an even deeper sense of guilt.......

I really need to talk about this, it is so debilitating at times and has had me in tears at really awkward and unexpected moments this week. I feel like such a child over these emotions.......but don't want him to feel bad at making what is the best decision for himself and his family.

Is my guilt founded? Is it normal? Whatever normal is. How do I find a way to talk about this, properly, without apologising for him feeling the need to apologise to me......gah!

How do I do this.....and do therapy?????????