Beaflower, that's okay if you feel right now is not the right time do it when you feel comfortable. And you're right it hurts deeply when people just joke about it or see you as "slow" or uncapable of doing anything but a side of me says..you know what forget these people (even if it's someone close to you). One thing I try to keep in mind is, we can't do this for others we have to do it for ourselves to make ourselves proud and achieve it for our very own success.

I'm going to look into getting therapist as well, hopefully we're able to find one