Until therapy my mother was the bain of my life. But with therapy I've taught my mother how to treat me now. The anger is lessoning, the reality of knowing my mothers life growing up made her the person she was sits better with me now.

My anger didn't seem to fit with the mother she is now, shes an elderly lady of 80 that often times now tries to tell me if she had her time again she'd do better.

I dont want to live a life full of anger and blaming, its no good to me, its not where I want to be or who I want to be. I never thought I'd be able to say that once upon a time.

Its like someone else posted here its acceptence of what is and was and what can never be.

Just because I suffered growing up that doesn't make me an angel of a better person then anyone else, its just gives me better insight into human nature and all its flaws.

I'm happy where I am today, I'm happy I can speak with my mother and see her life with sensitive eyes now, and I'm happy she turns to me to help her understand what went wrong with us.

She doesn't know a lot of the stuff I experienced as a child adn I do not wish her to know that. I'm ok with the understanding my T has given me.

I have been heard by another human being in this world and it just happened that it couldn't be neither of my mothers, birth or adoptive, but it really is ok today!