Quote:
Originally Posted by ladisputelover
I hate feeling like this. Like everything isn't real. Like I'm not real. Like my life is all a lie.
I feel so disconnected from everything. I look in the mirror and sometimes, I'm not sure who I'm looking at. I feel like an imposter in my own body.
I just hate it. I feel so confused. Who am I? Is this really happening or is it all a dream? Does the entire world really exist or was the idea of life planted in our minds to make us experience it and then one day will it all be taken away? I don't know.
My thoughts aren't mine. I'm not sure who's they are, but I know I didn't think them; someone put them there. They're making me do the things I do and say the things I say. I am not me. I am nobody. I do not exist.
Or do I?
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your question do you exist or dont you exist...sorry but we can not answer this for you, objectively for a couple reasons...
.this website does not allow us to question or state whether a member\their problem \\their disorder exists we must accept all posts as they exist in what ever words the poster posts, so respecting the rules of this site anyone that replies to this is going to say you and your problems/mental disorder what ever exists.
plus we are not in your body and we are not your treatment providers, and anyone can be anyone or anything that they choose to post on the internet, therefore again we can not tell you definitively whether or not you or your problems exist other stating you exist according to t he rules of this site.
your question aside yes I have had these same problems where I question whether reality is real, whether what I see or think about myself, my world is real or not.sometimes my treatment providers call it psychosis, hallucinations, delusional thinking and other times they call it depersonalization/derealization symptoms in me and other things. when I have questions and feelings like this I take it to my treatment providers. they assess what is causing the problem and let me know whether what Im thinking and feeling is being real existing or not, as a physical human being we know I exist otherwise I would not be feeling and thinking this way. I would be as my treatment providers tell me "frankly if you didnt exist you would be dead and burried or not even born yet," obviously I have been born and since I have a heart beat Im not dead..then they do their mental assessment and treat me according to what is causing the problem to begin with. sometimes its just a matter of meds adjustment other times its just a matter of my getting back on track and following my breathing/grounding/diet/exercise and sleep schedule.
my suggestion contact your treatment provider they will be able to help you figure out what is going on and how to best help you.