This is harder than I thought it would be. Drinking is not the correct thing to do I'm sure, it makes me feel bad after the numbing effect wears off. Thing is, t can help me with the drinking so much because he has done it before. I just don't know how I am going to wait and make it through the next 50 days. I plan on calling his office first thing tomorrow and seeing if there are any cancellations or if there's any thing they can do. At the very least I'll want to schedule a crap ton more appointments.
What I should do to pass the days is get real strong and get in shape so I can show t how good I can do. But I feel like I need his support first. When I saw him two and a half years ago I quit smoking and drinking, and started running all so quick. My health was on the mend and so quick. But it was because of him. I need him again to do this with me. I need him so much and I hate needing any one like this and this much but he awakened this need in me.
Guess I'll just call his office and see what can be done... and journal tomorrow too.