Here's the msg I left her. I actually wrote it up and read it I hope it's a good lead in for tomorrow. And then I'll work on writing up a letter I can read to her tomorrow. My hope is to remove my "attitude" so she doesn't get defensive, but still clearly communicate how I'm feeling.

"Hi T. It's Scarlet. I'm scared to see you again. I'm sorry I'm struggling and worrying you. I don't like it when we constantly argue. You once told me we can talk about me feeling disconnected whenever it comes up. But I'm really scared to talk to you because I'm afraid that you're going to get mad and leave. Can you please help me tomorrow reduce the anxiety I have concerning you?"

You know, I think I'm communicate better with writing because I have to use my logical part of my brain already to write coherently.