I hate crying, always have and always will. I'd rather be horribly sick from top to bottom than cry, especially cry in front of others. I am independent, insecure, and self reliant to the point I'd rather cut my arm off than ask for help. I know this isn't healthy but after years of hiding my true self, pain and all, I conditioned myself to not cry and to stifle my emotions.

However, now that I am finally to a place in my life where I need the release of a hard cry. I just CAN'T! I get teary eyed but my body shuts it down. Even though I want and need to cry before I explode I can't and it is killing me. I haven't had a real cry in over a year.

Any suggestions or am I SOL?