Friday evening and it is his birthday today.....I had made huge plans to celecbrate it with him, and I find myself home alone.

I have been to our club and had a couple of drinks and played the pokies...but got myself away from that environment just in time. I am now at home knowing that he is having a good time with out me........ouch ouch that hurts...is it pride or ego or loneliness or missing him.

My mind is spining...I'm so angry...Why Why Why Why did he choose them and not me....!!!!

He should be here with me...NOW. God I'm angry and normally I am a carm rational person...(not really rational...but I like to pretend.)

How dare he treat me like this.
Should I
Should'nt I

Should I
Should'nt I

Should I
Should'nt I

Should I
Should'nt I

Ring him...I know I will only be angry and he will hang up and I will still feel empty.

How I love his touch his tender loving hands and his total devotion to me and I to him...................it's not fair WHY WHY WHY.......!!!!!!!!!

Sorry I'm going total banana's about this how dare he call it OFF when I have given so much to him.....were is the respect and loving that we use to share.

SO SAD...........I need a hug