Thank you both. I think I needed to hear this. Sometimes you know something but you need to see it from a different perspective to actually realize it.
As for my relationship with my boyfriend, it's not perfect but I'm mostly the reason for that. Especially for the past year with all that insecurity. I think I used this long distance friendship, if it was a friendship to begin with, to try and escape everything in my life that wasn't perfect. My life changed a lot in the past year. I used to be scared and insecure about my future. Now I have plans, a well paid job and a tight schedule which makes me feel good. So by this logic I would expect to stop caring about him. But I guess I need some more time. Or I'm searching for the wrong reasons. Whatever happened happened. Once a person moves on there's not much to do.
Anyway, I am extremely grateful for your answers, truly. I hope I get over it soon. I'll do my best.