Sorry for the loss of your dad. I lost my mom in Jan of this year. My mom was my best friend and I'm really lost without her. I wish I could tell you it gets easier but you just got to take it as it comes. Like your dad my mom battled a long team sickness Multiple sclerosis. It breaks you to watch them become sick . I know you've been told this a billion times but your dad's not in pain anymore and I'm sure very proud of you.