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Resident Bipolar · Mar 15, 2015, 09:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by healingme4me

What drew you to this job, to begin with? That's a lot of traveling to have an employer behave abrasively. I once took this course on corporate social responsibility. It involved studying ethics. The Golden Rule, happens to be a top ethical standard. As a manager, I'd personally, prefer that all of my employees were sensitive to the plight of one another. Any employee traveling two hours just to be there deserves a lot of consideration. Retail or office, the internal culture truly shouldn't be any different.
Your boss, do they realize they don't have a healthy group? Noone needs to be friends, yet, everyone needs to be professional and display respect towards one another. It trickles down to the customer and trickles up to the big bosses. I understand not everyone can be a leader, but it's not up to your coworkers to behave towards you as if they control the schedule/company.

With that performance review and your autism what's this drive to need to work? In the states, if you are disabled, you're disabled.

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Nothing particularly drew me to the job, it was just a random application among hundreds id made and I thought I could handle it. I just wanted a straightforward job to get myself off the benefits and into employment. However, I was told early on that my hours might be cut. Initially I was doing 15 and a half hours and I wwas happy that was being cut, as I couldn't handle the hours and my GP recommended I cut them down and go back onto benefit.

Anyway. My mood declined and I'm in the middle of the worst episode I've had since I was last sectioned, two years ago. I'm struggling even with seven hours, because not only the travel is draining but also because work is an extremely hostile environment and I don't have it in me to pretend to be happy and smiley.

The managers themselves are a big part of the problem. Im not the only person experiencing difficulties there and people have expressed their concerns to me. It's a very intimidating and hostile environment.

I began working because I thought I was ready. I'd been stable for quite a while. It didn't last unfortunately. And now I'm here.

In my performance review, a big part of me getting a bad rating was because I don't use my own initiative and need telling what to do, but a big part of that is because I do need prompts.

Eventually I adopted the attitude that I'm not there to make friends, I'm there to do my work and go. But it's not that simple. Because I am struggling to get out of bed, let alone go through the ritual of getting ready and putting myself through what I consider to be bullying. It's a pack mentality going on and I'm the prey.