Thanks for the clarification there. So he has resolved at least that he isn't actually a woman and doesn't want to go through with that anymore, but he is a trauma survivor, and probably still has a lot to work on with that. I don't see how you can just "get over" a shock like that. It is natural to have strong feelings about it. A lot of times when someone close to you has serious difficulties, you as a support person could benefit from therapy also to help you deal with your reactions to their problem. I would recommend that you find someone (probably a therapist) who can help you work out your feelings about this issue, since it does impact you even though he says he was wrong about it and doesn't want it to affect your relationship anymore. Maybe he doesn't feel like discussing it, but your feelings are still there and they are real and they will have an impact, no matter how hard you might try not to let them. I can definitely understand being overwhelmed about this! Anyone would be.