I've been doing kegels for a few years and whenever I slack off, my bladder does not seem to be as strong. I am living proof that at least to some extent, kegel exercises work!
Certainly speak with your doctor about bedwetting, not that she couldn't have plus it's her responsibility. Kegal exercises, I learned about from a nurse, when I was six and fell from a bike having reconstructive surgery will help with control of your muscles that will help accidents. A plastic cover on a mattress and immediately stripping the linen every morning. Hopefully you are also showering every morning.
I cannot stress enough the need to put down electronics at night, and begin a sleep routine, which will help you with bedwetting, you might be hitting REM sleep overexhausted. You aren't a baby for this happening, it's such a common issue, hence all the oodles of literature on it.
Not sure why the need for so much yelling, is she in therapy, that you are aware of? At some point, stress as a parent changes as kids grow, so your being a teenager, I'm surprised. Does your dad also yell?
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