Darling T,

That hug was awkward from me. I didn't even remember what it felt like from you other than, "she's hugging me, she's hugging me, she's actually hugging me". It's been on my mind tonight. I want a redo.

I hate that I want a redo.

I hate that I miss you.

My heart hurts.

I didn't want to feel this way about my T, yet I find myself here, feeling this way.

You say it's okay, I want to fight it.

I'm trying to just let it be what it is.

I'm jealous that others feel this way about you & that frustrates me because I understand it, I get the need. I understand it's your job and this is how you help people.

I hate it.

I hate that I have these feelings.

~EM