Hi Renounced
When you're saying "is definitely not relatable to any normal human being at all".......what I'm reading is you've got some problems with following some "social norms" as you've talked about your autism before or/and that your confidence/self-esteem sometimes effect the way you'd like to behave, so if you can forgive me for not going along with that statement??
And you know in a lot of areas "social norms" don't always have to be that rigid.........if someone walks a little differently, talks or thinks differently that can still be OK. In fact sometimes individuality can be seen as a good thing, can sometimes make you stand out in a good way.
And some "social norms" that may be more important, well maybe you could learn them.......write them down as a list of "rules" to try to remember........they may not come "naturally" to you, but there will be other people out there who will be understanding, who will understand if you don't always follow that list, who you can be yourself with without having to think about trying as well.
And the feeling of worthlessness, the confidence/self-esteem.......got to effect things like the walking, the behaviour........right?? But you know that can be worked on, because ultimately/regardless of everything you are more than worthy
And you remember we've already addressed your intelligence and appearance, right?!!
And the guilt, the saying/doing the wrong thing...........well you know in my opinion that you're sometimes "beating yourself up" unnecessarily for that
But hey, you can always learn from your mistakes too, you really can, because you do have a lot to give. Try not to take that opportunity away from yourself, hey??
And when people get to know you, they're going to be seeing "the bigger picture", the whole you so some of those mistakes aren't going to seem that significant at all.
And I'm betting with your self-esteem issues you aren't actually seeing how many mistakes other people make, maybe a lot more than you've noticed because you're probably mainly seeing almost all of the better bits about them, right?? Just like when you make the odd mistake it can still be OK
And the ruining someones life with something you say..........well generally you've got to give other people some responsibility for their lives, right?? So generally, if you say the wrong thing, then they do have some responsibility for thinking to themselves "No, that's wrong........No, I don't agree.........No, I'm not taking that on board" or something like that.
But if you think that person is vulnerable.......and I can see you're already really sensitive to that possibility, so you're prepared.........then just work out some things you can say to make things a bit easier if you are wrong/and to acknowledge that you might be wrong e.g. "I'm not sure but...........what do you think???" or "Tell me if I'm wrong but........." something like that.
And I'd definitely say some more help with the depression, hey???
Because the depression can definitely be impacting on everything you've said.



Alison