Hi Rhapsody -

This didn't happen to me but I watched it happen to my mom. Her parents were divorced when she was 5 years old. In that day and age, my grandmother had to ask her father for permission to get divorced because my grandfather was an alcoholic and was running around town with women.

My grandfather briefly came back in my mom's life when I was 13 and I met him. Then we didn't see him again until I was 21ish.

He called my mom to reconnect and after doing so, discovered that he had cancer (I'm still not clear, but I think he knew he had cancer when he came back in her life). My mom did go back to have a relationship with him. I couldn't understand why.

She was there when he was on hospice and dying. At one point he told her he wanted to explain "his side of the story". My mom told him she didn't want to know. I was like "are you nuts? I'd want to know!" But she said it wouldn't make a difference anymore.

I guess the answer is an individual choice. My mom never said she forgave him, but I think she made peace with what happened.

Tranquility