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Mar 17, 2015, 08:38 AM
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Member Since: Mar 2015
Location: Canada
Posts: 9
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Hi thereI'm in my 40s and returned to unversity to get my degree in psychology. A casual friend of mine moved into my house with me to share the bills while we're both students. He is not a good communicator and seems to be defensive about a lot of things. For example, this morning a car pulled into the driveway and he was in the kitchen. I told him his ride was here and he answered, 'I know' in that tone that make you feel like you've said something stupid. It's like he doesn't want to admit that he doesn't know something. It's happened several times over the course of 8 months. He also doesn't respond to me to at all at certain times. We share groceries, and last week I told him that there was half a meatloaf in the fridge if he wanted it. I got nothing. No acknowledgement whatsoever. It's gotten to the point where I just don't bother talking to him anymore. I find myself gauging his mood on a daily basis, and weighing that against the importance of what I want to talk about. Nine out of ten times, I say nothing, and he rarely initiates a conversation on his own.
I have asked him a few times to open up a bit, and he says he will but then, nothing. I don't know if he doesn't know how or just that he doesn't want to. In either case, I'm often on pins and needles in my own home.
He does have some fantastic qualities, like kindness, generosity, and a great sense of humour, but it's sporadic, and on his terms.
I'm thinking of asking him to write a theraputic letter to aid us in communicating. He runs deep, but I don't think he has the tools to express himself in a meaningful way.
Any other suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
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